Last month, we looked at Rocky IV.  What I thought was my favorite Rocky movie, turned out to be nothing more than a racist missive, which completely overshadowed the greatness of Dolph Lundgren’s performance.  Today we are going to discuss Rocky III, and why it has become my favorite film in the Rocky hexalogy.  Here are my reasons, in no particular order:

• Mr. T is the antagonist.  Could have used more gold jewelry, though.
• At the end of Rocky II, Rocky was a functioning retard, (and I mean that in the way Rush Limbaugh uses the term, not the way Rahm Emmanuel uses it) and at the beginning of Rocky III he has transformed into a suave, man-about-town type.  Somehow, Rocky got smarter.  I understand becoming more sophisticated…but suddenly he can speak English that I can understand?  Weird.
• The bronze statue of Rocky is not just a prop, but also an actual landmark in Philadelphia.  Lolz.
• The scene where Rocky and Apollo frolic in the ocean together paved the way for films like Brokeback Mountain and Breaking the Surface: The Greg Louganis Story.
• Mickey dies.  With Mickey out of the way, Paulie really has a chance to shine…especially his-old timey racism.
• “Eye of the Tiger” by Survivor is introduced to the world.  Great motivational song or greatest motivational song?
• Rocky III is the first time Mr. T utters the phrase, “I pity the fool.”  Seriously.  I had no idea that line came from this movie.  Mr. T owes Sylvester Stallone his entire career after Rocky III.
• Hulk Hogan is in the movie, and he plays a professional wrestler named Thunderlips.  They should have made a trilogy of Thunderlips movies.
• Rocky wins back his title essentially because Mr. T got tired.

I think that pretty much covers it.  Perhaps next month we will deconstruct the redemption themes of Rocky II…or maybe I’ll just make fun of the Trans Am Rocky bought with his newfound riches. 

Original otter via

1. hurtinbombs liked this
2. youotterreadthisblog posted this